Because no recap could do this exchange between Dwight and Andy justice:
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Goodbye, Holly Flax
Oh Holly, I'm going to miss you. I loved your quirkiness. You were so sweet and odd and perfect for Michael. I'm sorry to see you go. But the fact that you are going means Pam is probably not and that makes me VERY happy. I've been really worried about Jim and Pam and the amount of time they've been spending apart. I was even more worried when Jim's brothers started to mock Pam, regardless of whether or not they thought it was a joke, because at this point I will be suspect of anything that could potentially impede their marriage. Everything turned out ok and it seems the brothers were simply hazing Pam by making fun of her chose profession. Now when is Pam moving back to Scranton.
But back to Holly. Holly has to move back to NH since corporate found out that she and Michael were dating. This leads to an awkward road trip where they break up in the car with Darryl listening (Darryl tried to make a phone call so he wouldn't have to listen. Hilarious). The whole plot just left me feeling sad. I like Holly. I hope they figure out a way for her to come back. Also, Amy Ryan is totally getting a Guest Comedy Actress for this stint. She was wonderful.
Finally, I loved, loved, LOVED, Dwight taunting Andy by embracing all the Cornell stuff. Because someone like Andy would TOTALLY get pissed about someone posing, just like that time I was at happy hour ans we tried to figure out if the guy in the Harvard sweatshirt ACTUALLY went to Harvard. I digress. But seriously, when did Dwight learn how to taunt someone like this? Has he been paying attention to Jim? It made him so much more interesting. Also, loved Andy dressed up as a farmer. Hilarious.
Finally, I think we need to run through the Halloween costumes from the opening segment, because I rewound the the show three times to make sure I got all of them. We had:
"Who are you, Larry King?" "Gordon Gekko." "Oh from the insurance commericals."--Kelly and Ryan
"And I can't even take off my hat. Because then I'm Hitler."--Pam dressed as Charlie Chaplin.
"Allergies? Did Darryl touch you?"--Michael to Holly's crying.
I would say this was an ok episode, but I would much rather have seen them explore the Halloween stuff a bit more as I think that would have made for a much, much more interesting episode. Oh well.
But back to Holly. Holly has to move back to NH since corporate found out that she and Michael were dating. This leads to an awkward road trip where they break up in the car with Darryl listening (Darryl tried to make a phone call so he wouldn't have to listen. Hilarious). The whole plot just left me feeling sad. I like Holly. I hope they figure out a way for her to come back. Also, Amy Ryan is totally getting a Guest Comedy Actress for this stint. She was wonderful.
Finally, I loved, loved, LOVED, Dwight taunting Andy by embracing all the Cornell stuff. Because someone like Andy would TOTALLY get pissed about someone posing, just like that time I was at happy hour ans we tried to figure out if the guy in the Harvard sweatshirt ACTUALLY went to Harvard. I digress. But seriously, when did Dwight learn how to taunt someone like this? Has he been paying attention to Jim? It made him so much more interesting. Also, loved Andy dressed up as a farmer. Hilarious.
Finally, I think we need to run through the Halloween costumes from the opening segment, because I rewound the the show three times to make sure I got all of them. We had:
- Kelly as Carrie Bradshaw
- Phyllis as Raggedy Ann
- Ryan as Gordon Gekko
- Creed as the Joker, which will be giving me nightmares thank you.
- Oscar as Uncle Sam.
- Meredith as a (slutty) cheerleader.
- Kevin as a less good Joker
- Angela as a cat
- Andy as a Cat from CATS. Hah.
- Jim wearing a name tag that says Dave.
- Pam as Charlie Chaplin, or Hitler with a hat.
- And Dwight as the Joker too, making a reference to the pencil "magic trick". AHHHHH.
"Who are you, Larry King?" "Gordon Gekko." "Oh from the insurance commericals."--Kelly and Ryan
"And I can't even take off my hat. Because then I'm Hitler."--Pam dressed as Charlie Chaplin.
"Allergies? Did Darryl touch you?"--Michael to Holly's crying.
I would say this was an ok episode, but I would much rather have seen them explore the Halloween stuff a bit more as I think that would have made for a much, much more interesting episode. Oh well.
Anatomy Jane and the Pigs of Doom
Ok boys and girls, are you ready for your bedtime story? Ok. Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Jane who had plastic internal organs. All the doctors in the land loved little Jane, because she could show them how to be doctors without ever getting hurt. It was a wonderful time and peace reigned throughout the land until one day a big bad doctor from a foreign land came to town. All of the people in the land were so afraid of the doctor that they refused to refer to him by name and instead called him simply the Major. The Major did not like little Jane and the way she helped the doctors learn. He thought that learning could only come through pain and suffering. So the Major used his magic powers to put a spell on all the doctors and force them to practice on pigs. And so they did and darkness fell upon the land. Very soon the doctors were taking all the pigs away for practice, leaving no pigs for food or farming. No more bacon, no more pork, no more ribs, no more hot dogs. The lack of pork of products made all the children in the land very sad. They went to little Jane, who had been the doctors' favorite, and begged her to do something. And little Jane did. She went to The Clinic, the secret place where all the doctors took the pigs to die. She snuck past the guards and went to the big room where all the doctors were practicing. The doctors, still under their spell, would not look at her. Little Jane was confused. She couldn't understand why they would ignore her, their favorite. Little Jane then had an idea. Slowly, one by one, she began to remove her plastic organs. As she did so she yelled "Doctors look, see? You can take out my organs and you won't hurt me, so keep practicing on me. Don't hurt those little pigs." The doctors, moved by little Jane's pleas, snapped out of their spell. They sewed the pigs back up and promised never to practice on them again. Even the Major was affected by little Jane. He promised never to force anyone to practice on pigs ever again. Sunshine and happiness and hot dogs returned to the land and the people lived in happiness once again forever and ever. The end.
Did you like my story? Because it's not too, too far off what happened--or I should say WHAT THE FUCK happened--tonight on Grey's. Seriously? Seriously? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT EPISODE? I'm not saying I didn't like it, but I am saying it was like some kind of weird drug trip. Let me sum up the three plots: pigs, little girl with no organs, lesbians. Can you draw a connection between those three? No? Well let me explain each of them to you.
Pigs: Dr. Major Hunt has returned to the hospital as Chief of Trauma, and I think he took that to mean that his job was to traumatize the audience. Christina got all twitchy and girly at the sight of him, which was the first sign that tonight was going to be weird, because Christina never does that. Dr. Major Hunt's first assignment: teach all the interns nd residents about trauma in a practical lab. How does he do that? By BRINGING IN A BUNCH OF FUCKING PIGS AND STABBING THEM. No, I did not just make that up. That's what happened. Sidenote: The only reason I watched Grey's first tonight was because of the title card before the episode saying no animals had been hurt in the filming of the episode, because I thought that was odd for a hospital drama. I was right. Continuing on......Izzie decides that she will not stand for this and leaves, but Christina gets all excited. That is until a real trauma comes in and Dr. Major Hunt lets everyone else go deal with traumas but makes Christina and her team take care of all the pigs. Yeah. At first Christina is all "Fuck this," but eventually she warms up and even starts referring to the pigs by the names the interns have given them. Then one of the pigs starts to bleed out and she has to perform surgery on it blah blah blah we know how this ends and the pig is fine. Dr. Major Hunt is impressed by her ability to keep the pigs alive and then when everything is said and done HE TELLS HER TO KILL ALL OF THE PIGS. WHAT THE FUCK?!!!!!!!! Christina storms off and Dr. Major Hunt goes after and we get the backstory to why he's back at Seattle Grace: during his last tour he was the only one of 20 men to survive an attack, so he was discharged from the army. So he's all scary and damaged or dark and twisty or whatever the fuck this show is calling people with emotional problems these days and Christina is totally falling in love with him as he's talking. She's going to want to fix him and love him and blah blah blah we know how this will end: She'll either get married to him, magically turning her into a human being, or he'll leave/die and turn her crazier than 10 Izzies put together. Yeah. Buckle your seat belts children, this one is going to be a bumpy ride.
Little Girl With No Organs: We'll start this one with Meredith, who was moving some old boxes of hers back up to the attic and wound opening some and looking through them, which is totally realistic because I would much rather look through my old shit than clean any of it. Anyway, Mer finds one of her old dolls, Anatomy Jane, which is fugly ass doll dressed in a hopsital gown with removable organs. You know, I've got say, Ellis Grey was one sick bitch (and I mean that in the nicest way possible) because of course she would never let her daughter play with a Barbie doll. No she gets to play with the doll that will teach her to be a doctor. Why is Anatomy Jane important? Stick with me. Elsewhere, the Chief is telling Bailey that she's awesome (duh) and a good surgeon (double duh) but that if she wants to be the greatest surgeon at Seattle Grace she's going to have to start acting more like him (huh?). Then a plane a lands with a little girl with a huge weird inoperable tumor and the Chief is all like "Dr. Bailey, your misson, if you choose to accept it is to save this little girl's life by the end of the day, while delivering as many awesome monologues as you can," to which Bailey is like "Listen dude, I will accept your challenge cause fuck if this shit don't get me an Emmy nothing will." So Bailey needs an intern for her little mission and picks Mer since she brought her Anatomy Jane doll to the hospital with her. Because Mer is still 5 and thinks you take toys with you to work (Sidenote: I am totally justified in playing with my Rubik's cube at work because (1) they gave them to us and (2) it's a thought stimulator which means its not a toy, so anyone accusing me of being hypocritical here, hah). So the little girl is pretty fucked since the tumor is growing around almost all of her internal organs. They have a big meeting where the Chief scolds Mer for playing with her doll instead of contributing and she gets all "Listen dude who broke up family, this doll is helping me come up with the answer that's going to make all y'all look good so shut the fuck up please." The doll does help, though, as Mer suggests removing all the girls internal organs, removing the tumors from them, and then putting them back again. Because shit like that happens all the time. The rest of this plays out pretty much how you would expect: big meeting with the family to convince them to go ahead with crazy surgery, surgeons getting distracted by their private problems (in this case the Chief being mean to Mer because the doll dredges up old memories), something seems to go wrong, but in the end the doctors figure it out, little girl lives, and sunshine and happiness and hot dogs return to the land forever and ever. There was one other little snag, though, but I'll get to that when I talk about the.....
Lesbians: So Callie and Hahn are still having amazing sex. Good for them. Things seem to be going well for them until Hahn starts crying and telling a story about how this was like when she was a little girl and got glasses and now she can see and she says the word "gay" like 20 times, which of course freaks Callie out. What does Callie do when she's freaked out? Have sex with Sloan, of course, which she does, twice. This makes her realize that she really likes sleeping with Erica and that she has feelings for Erica, but she's not sure whether she's gay, bi, or just-experimenting-like-two-college-girls-in-a-sorority-house-after-a-mixer-bow-chicka-bow-wow-I'm-digressing-aren't-I. So at the end of the day she tells Hahn that she wants to be with her but that she slept with Sloan and she's sorry and Hahn's all "Well fine, but not really since you leaving me this morning made me all upset and mean and a huge bitch to Bailey all day and almost made me ruin the little girl with no organ's surgery but whatever since I'm lesbian now I will forgive you so we can continue to have sex so fine I'll forgive you." So what does Callie do? Go for a drink with Sloan. Because that makes sense. Ok, I get that Sloan and Callie are friends and I like how he's been helping her through this, but this is ust asking for trouble. And what's going to happen when the new bisexual intern shows up? Oh I know. My head will explode.
Other things I liked:
The BSCI Index:
Well our girl was really in rare form tonight. She's went off on Dr. Major Hunt about the pig thing a couple of times (which I kind of agree with her about, but that's prob why I'm not a doctor), told Derek he disgusts her (because as if), and got mad at Alex for being Alex (which she really should be used to by now, but she's BSCI, so of course not). The worst though, was at the end of the episode when she started telling Alex how he should tell her how wonderful she is. I almost vomited in my mouth. This, coupled with the scenes from next week flashing back to her heart-stealing days, puts the BSCI index at an 8.2 with a very probable rise next week since the episode looks to be very Izzie centric. Ughh.
And now I will leave you with some quotes. Tonight's episode was weird y'all and I'm afraid next week will be more of the same. I really hope Shonda hasn't started taking her crazy pills again, because I don't think the show will recover.
"Save a girl with an inoperable tumor?" "It's not easy being me."--Bailey and the Chief
"Next time you'll know to bring in an ugly doll."--Bailey about Anatomy Jane
"Are you petting the pig? Stop petting the pig."--Christina to Lexie. Was that a sex metaphor?
"I could give them numbers, but then I'd probably tell you three needs antibotics and find you sticking a needle in Grey's ass."--Christina.
"I named the pigs today." "I'm sorry I don't know what that means."--Lexie and George.
Did you like my story? Because it's not too, too far off what happened--or I should say WHAT THE FUCK happened--tonight on Grey's. Seriously? Seriously? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT EPISODE? I'm not saying I didn't like it, but I am saying it was like some kind of weird drug trip. Let me sum up the three plots: pigs, little girl with no organs, lesbians. Can you draw a connection between those three? No? Well let me explain each of them to you.
Pigs: Dr. Major Hunt has returned to the hospital as Chief of Trauma, and I think he took that to mean that his job was to traumatize the audience. Christina got all twitchy and girly at the sight of him, which was the first sign that tonight was going to be weird, because Christina never does that. Dr. Major Hunt's first assignment: teach all the interns nd residents about trauma in a practical lab. How does he do that? By BRINGING IN A BUNCH OF FUCKING PIGS AND STABBING THEM. No, I did not just make that up. That's what happened. Sidenote: The only reason I watched Grey's first tonight was because of the title card before the episode saying no animals had been hurt in the filming of the episode, because I thought that was odd for a hospital drama. I was right. Continuing on......Izzie decides that she will not stand for this and leaves, but Christina gets all excited. That is until a real trauma comes in and Dr. Major Hunt lets everyone else go deal with traumas but makes Christina and her team take care of all the pigs. Yeah. At first Christina is all "Fuck this," but eventually she warms up and even starts referring to the pigs by the names the interns have given them. Then one of the pigs starts to bleed out and she has to perform surgery on it blah blah blah we know how this ends and the pig is fine. Dr. Major Hunt is impressed by her ability to keep the pigs alive and then when everything is said and done HE TELLS HER TO KILL ALL OF THE PIGS. WHAT THE FUCK?!!!!!!!! Christina storms off and Dr. Major Hunt goes after and we get the backstory to why he's back at Seattle Grace: during his last tour he was the only one of 20 men to survive an attack, so he was discharged from the army. So he's all scary and damaged or dark and twisty or whatever the fuck this show is calling people with emotional problems these days and Christina is totally falling in love with him as he's talking. She's going to want to fix him and love him and blah blah blah we know how this will end: She'll either get married to him, magically turning her into a human being, or he'll leave/die and turn her crazier than 10 Izzies put together. Yeah. Buckle your seat belts children, this one is going to be a bumpy ride.
Little Girl With No Organs: We'll start this one with Meredith, who was moving some old boxes of hers back up to the attic and wound opening some and looking through them, which is totally realistic because I would much rather look through my old shit than clean any of it. Anyway, Mer finds one of her old dolls, Anatomy Jane, which is fugly ass doll dressed in a hopsital gown with removable organs. You know, I've got say, Ellis Grey was one sick bitch (and I mean that in the nicest way possible) because of course she would never let her daughter play with a Barbie doll. No she gets to play with the doll that will teach her to be a doctor. Why is Anatomy Jane important? Stick with me. Elsewhere, the Chief is telling Bailey that she's awesome (duh) and a good surgeon (double duh) but that if she wants to be the greatest surgeon at Seattle Grace she's going to have to start acting more like him (huh?). Then a plane a lands with a little girl with a huge weird inoperable tumor and the Chief is all like "Dr. Bailey, your misson, if you choose to accept it is to save this little girl's life by the end of the day, while delivering as many awesome monologues as you can," to which Bailey is like "Listen dude, I will accept your challenge cause fuck if this shit don't get me an Emmy nothing will." So Bailey needs an intern for her little mission and picks Mer since she brought her Anatomy Jane doll to the hospital with her. Because Mer is still 5 and thinks you take toys with you to work (Sidenote: I am totally justified in playing with my Rubik's cube at work because (1) they gave them to us and (2) it's a thought stimulator which means its not a toy, so anyone accusing me of being hypocritical here, hah). So the little girl is pretty fucked since the tumor is growing around almost all of her internal organs. They have a big meeting where the Chief scolds Mer for playing with her doll instead of contributing and she gets all "Listen dude who broke up family, this doll is helping me come up with the answer that's going to make all y'all look good so shut the fuck up please." The doll does help, though, as Mer suggests removing all the girls internal organs, removing the tumors from them, and then putting them back again. Because shit like that happens all the time. The rest of this plays out pretty much how you would expect: big meeting with the family to convince them to go ahead with crazy surgery, surgeons getting distracted by their private problems (in this case the Chief being mean to Mer because the doll dredges up old memories), something seems to go wrong, but in the end the doctors figure it out, little girl lives, and sunshine and happiness and hot dogs return to the land forever and ever. There was one other little snag, though, but I'll get to that when I talk about the.....
Lesbians: So Callie and Hahn are still having amazing sex. Good for them. Things seem to be going well for them until Hahn starts crying and telling a story about how this was like when she was a little girl and got glasses and now she can see and she says the word "gay" like 20 times, which of course freaks Callie out. What does Callie do when she's freaked out? Have sex with Sloan, of course, which she does, twice. This makes her realize that she really likes sleeping with Erica and that she has feelings for Erica, but she's not sure whether she's gay, bi, or just-experimenting-like-two-college-girls-in-a-sorority-house-after-a-mixer-bow-chicka-bow-wow-I'm-digressing-aren't-I. So at the end of the day she tells Hahn that she wants to be with her but that she slept with Sloan and she's sorry and Hahn's all "Well fine, but not really since you leaving me this morning made me all upset and mean and a huge bitch to Bailey all day and almost made me ruin the little girl with no organ's surgery but whatever since I'm lesbian now I will forgive you so we can continue to have sex so fine I'll forgive you." So what does Callie do? Go for a drink with Sloan. Because that makes sense. Ok, I get that Sloan and Callie are friends and I like how he's been helping her through this, but this is ust asking for trouble. And what's going to happen when the new bisexual intern shows up? Oh I know. My head will explode.
Other things I liked:
- Derek and Sloan getting territorial around the new guy, because of course they would get like that.
- Lexie apologizing to George at the end of the episode for not keeping work separate from her personal life, because THAT'S SOMETHING THAT HAS NEVER EVER HAPPENED ON THIS SHOW.
- Alex and Izzie, because how the fuck are we supposed to believe that they're in a weird committed relationship now? Seriously? This also leads me too:
The BSCI Index:
Well our girl was really in rare form tonight. She's went off on Dr. Major Hunt about the pig thing a couple of times (which I kind of agree with her about, but that's prob why I'm not a doctor), told Derek he disgusts her (because as if), and got mad at Alex for being Alex (which she really should be used to by now, but she's BSCI, so of course not). The worst though, was at the end of the episode when she started telling Alex how he should tell her how wonderful she is. I almost vomited in my mouth. This, coupled with the scenes from next week flashing back to her heart-stealing days, puts the BSCI index at an 8.2 with a very probable rise next week since the episode looks to be very Izzie centric. Ughh.
And now I will leave you with some quotes. Tonight's episode was weird y'all and I'm afraid next week will be more of the same. I really hope Shonda hasn't started taking her crazy pills again, because I don't think the show will recover.
"Save a girl with an inoperable tumor?" "It's not easy being me."--Bailey and the Chief
"Next time you'll know to bring in an ugly doll."--Bailey about Anatomy Jane
"Are you petting the pig? Stop petting the pig."--Christina to Lexie. Was that a sex metaphor?
"I could give them numbers, but then I'd probably tell you three needs antibotics and find you sticking a needle in Grey's ass."--Christina.
"I named the pigs today." "I'm sorry I don't know what that means."--Lexie and George.
Today is Turning into Christmas
First we have 30 Rock coming back and then the annoucement of Cougar Town and then when I thought it couldn't get any better, the CW has to go and make me all happy. Michael Ausiello over at EW.com is reporting that the CW has ordered 3 additional episodes (2 a few weeks back and one today) of Gossip Girl, bringing the total order up to 25 episodes. To which I say: WOO FREAKING HOO! Apparently they also ordered additional eps of One Tree Hill and 9021-No, but who cares? We're getting three extra hours of wonderful New Serena, Chuck and Blair drama, snarky dialogue, and over-the-top-candelabras-and-lace-no-teenager-would-actually-ever-do-this seduction scenes. Can I get another WOO FREAKING HOO?
Am I Dreaming?
Today is going to be a very good day. EW.com reported this morning that Courtney Cox will be starring/exec-producing a single-camera comedy about a hot 40-year-old mother who’s newly single. The show's title? Cougar Town. A-FREAKING-MAZING. Assuming it's not completely awful, I'd bet that it easily becomes my favorite new show next season, if it indeed gets picked up by ABC. Only as long as they don't change the title, because the current title is amazing. A-FREAKING-MAZING. That is all.
Clip of the Day: It's Baaaaaaack
Because it will be baaaaaaaaaack tonight at 9:30. YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
For My Fellow Lost Fanatics
I love LOST, but I'm not a fan of LOST spoilers. I think there's something wonderful about just letting the show unfold in its magical, mysterious way without knowing what's going to happen. It makes all of the WTF moments that much better. That being said, Ask Ausiello from EW.com has revealed the titles of the first six episodes, and since LOST like is pretty much and epic novel with episodes as chapters, I don't think there's anything wrong with passing those along. Chapter titles are supposed to tantalize without revealing too much, right? In any case, here they are. Read them if you want to, or don't if you don't. It's not like the Island's fate depends on it or anything.
Episode 5.01 - Because You Left
Episode 5.02 - The Lie
Episode 5.03 - Jughead
Episode 5.04 - The Little Prince
Episode 5.05 - This Place is Death
Episode 5.06 - The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham
Excited yet?
Episode 5.01 - Because You Left
Episode 5.02 - The Lie
Episode 5.03 - Jughead
Episode 5.04 - The Little Prince
Episode 5.05 - This Place is Death
Episode 5.06 - The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham
Excited yet?
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Some Additional Gossip Thoughts
It occured to me this morning that--with his kiss with Jenny last night--Nate has now hooked up with every female character on the show save for Eleanor Waldorf and Lily van der Woodsen. To which I say: huh? I mean, I get it, dude is pretty, but he's so boring. What do all these girls see in him? Or maybe they don't see in him, they only see at him. I think my friend J summed it best in a conversation we had this morning, which, thanks to gchat, I can repeat verbatim:
me: Serena's new boyfriend looks like a pedophile
J: ugh yeah he's gross
nate is total eye candy
me: hahahaha
J: i am growing so in love with him
just his beautiful features
not his personality, obvi
I ask you though, are looks really enough to keep him interesting over the long term? I would ask myself the same question about Serena, but she went and got AWESOME a few weeks back, so I don't have to.
Also, and this is something I've been wondering, was Eleanor ever paying Jenny after she dropped out of school? Because if she wasn't I'm pretty sure that's illegal child labor. And that would make Eleanor even more awesome.
One last thing: spoilers abound that a character is going to go the Big Palace Hotel in the Sky (i.e., die) sometime over the next few weeks. Who else hopes it's Vanessa?
me: Serena's new boyfriend looks like a pedophile
J: ugh yeah he's gross
nate is total eye candy
me: hahahaha
J: i am growing so in love with him
just his beautiful features
not his personality, obvi
I ask you though, are looks really enough to keep him interesting over the long term? I would ask myself the same question about Serena, but she went and got AWESOME a few weeks back, so I don't have to.
Also, and this is something I've been wondering, was Eleanor ever paying Jenny after she dropped out of school? Because if she wasn't I'm pretty sure that's illegal child labor. And that would make Eleanor even more awesome.
One last thing: spoilers abound that a character is going to go the Big Palace Hotel in the Sky (i.e., die) sometime over the next few weeks. Who else hopes it's Vanessa?
Where is Pam?
So I never got around to my Office post from last week (Sorry!), but there is one thing I feel I must say: WHY IS PAM STILL IN NY? I thought her art school thing was only supposed to last three months and since the season premiere basically covered two months she should be back by now. But she's not. Why show? You're not planning on breaking Jim and Pam up are you? After you had stupid Andy ruin their engagement night? Or after keeping them apart for the better of three seasons? You wouldn't let us see Jim's heartfelt proposal, only to have them call off the engagement? You wouldn't ruin their happiness, would you? Would you, show? Because if that were the case, and I'm just speaking in hypotheticals here, I MIGHT have to boycott you. And I MIGHT have to come to LA and hurt you. I MIGHT. Please don't make me, show. Please. The choice is yours. Good day.
For the Commenter Who Asked
Unfortunately Banana Republic is no longer selling the blue argyle half-zip sweater through it's Web site. I would check the clearance rack of your local store. Sorry I couldn't be of more help.
Oh Liz Lemon
Because I just realized Hulu has posted the Season 3 premiere on it's site two days before it's supposed to air (!):
Monday, October 27, 2008
The Mullet Strikes Back
So I'm going to start this week's post about THE BEST SHOW EVER with an apology. I was talking to a friend this week--who in honor of GG I will simply refer to as E--who thinks that in my rapturous recapping of each week's events that I may be unwilling or unable to see any of the show's flaws, which means that I basically have no credibility as a recapper. My first reaction was "Flaws? GG has no flaws. Do not blaspheme." But in retrospect, I think the last few recaps may have been a little light on criticism, but in my defense, I, like Dan in tonight's episode, was so afraid to offer any criticism for fear of what New Serena might do to me. Actually, I was blinded by my love for new Serena, but that is one thing I will NEVER, EVER take back. I LOVE HER. Ok moving on.
If there was a theme running through tonight's episode, it was boundaries and the need of teenagers to push them as far as possible. Let's start with with our number one boundary pusher, Little Jenny Humphrey. It was only a matter of time before Little J got back to testing the waters. She wasn't a 15 year old beard last season for nothing. Her first boundary of the night? Human vision. What the fuck is up with her hair? It looks like a cat died on top of her head and then got sprayed with olive oil. Here's a tip Little J: MULLETS LOOK AWFUL NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE. Poor Taylor Momsen (that's the actress who plays Little J), she paying a real price for fame. Apparently her assault on the audience's eyes was not enough for Little J, since she decided to go head to head with Eleanor Waldorf. Eleanor is using "meeting with buyers" as a carrot to keep J working as her personal sweatshop. Apparently Little J is the only person that can produce anything the designers want. This fact is brought to Little J's attention by a model named Agnes (played by KAITLIN COOPER from the O.C.) KAITLIN COOPER also has a sketchy boyfriend named Max who likes taking pictures (read: amateur pornographer) and a lot of model friends and contacts. Little J is impressed with Agnes and, after Eleanor reams her for not having a dress prepared for the meeting, quits. This also provides the opportunity for the return of what I like to call the Jenny Humphrey Scary Face. You've seen it before: it's the face she makes whenever she feels like she's in charge of the situation. Still can't place it? It's the face where her eyes go all dead and you expect her to start spouting lines from The Ring. Remember now? Good. Little J is at first a bit worried about what this means for her future, but then Agnes shows up at the gallery opening (more on that later) and promises to introduce to her to an editor from Nylon who wants to do a feature on her. All Little J has to do is go with Agnes and sketchy boyfriend to a "party." You know the kind I'm talking about: beer, music, couple looking to bring a third person into their bedroom. That kind of party. Before you know it, Little J is dancing around in her bra (which I would be ok with except for the fact that the actress that plays her is actually 15 so NOT COOL) until Nate, who disapproved of her going to the sex party, comes to get her and refuses to leave without her. Little J is indignant, until Nate gives her his sexy eyes and they make out. Confused as to why Jenny and Nate are now an item? So am I. Boo show. There was not set up to that one at all. You can do better.
Moving on to our "B stands for Better" plot, Blair is now chasing after Chuck, pushing her ability to give in to her feelings and actually do something she would never actually do: be the pursuer. Ughh. Nope, our B would much rather lie in bed and take matters into her own hands, if you know what I mean (wink, wink, nudge, nudge). B is at so much of a loss about what to do that she actually lets S talk her into taking advice from Dan Humphrey. Yeah, that's a good idea B. Hey, here's another: why don't you tell Chuck you're a tranny. I bet that will work out just as well. Dan actually gives Blair some decent advice: Chuck is a guy, so all B has to do is throw herself at him repeatedly and eventually he will give in. Duh. This leads B to: lace stockings, touching Chuck's crotch, candles in Serena's bedroom, and lingerie. It also leads B and S to make several trips to Brooklyn so that B can get more advice from Douchey Dan (I hate Dan). While B consults with the jackass, S meets the weird looking artist who is putting the show together, and I think you all have to agree with me that this is certainly a step down for our wonderful goddess. Dude--who's name is Aaron apparently--looks like that creepy guy from section who would just stares at you and makes you feel uncomfortable. There's a rebound guy, S, and then there's insanity. Don't be insane, S. You can do better. So while S is flirting with weirdo, Vanessa, who was in the episode for all of two seconds, thank god, tells him about the Cruel Intentions Chuck and B had last week, the bitch. Dan decides to manipulate B into refusing to confess her feelings as she was finally getting ready to do, to which I say: oh ho Daniel, finally starting to come over to the dark side are we? Jackass. Can't be so judgmental anymore can we? Jackass. I hate you. So B caves and she and Chuck start arguing about their inability to act like anyone but the people from Cruel Intentions to each other and B leaves in tears. S sees her and I'm like "Oh yes, S, is going to flip her shit." She confronts Dan and he admits he manipulated B. Yup, here she comes. Dan says the only reason he helped Blair was that he was afraid S was going to flip her shit on him. Which she should Dan, because she is so much better than you. S loves being told people are scared of her, so she relents. Dan also tries to put things right by telling Chuck to go to Blair, but all that happens is that they both admit they're not ready to be together, as evidenced by their inability to say "those three little words." I have three little words I can say: WHAT, THE, FUCK?!!! Seriously, show, you better get these two together soon. You're giving the audience blue balls and they're going to get pissed.
Quote time:
"Don't forget, God always watching Miss Blair."--Dorota when she catches Blair practicing her master debating techniques.
"I have an itch that only Chuck can scratch and he won't oblige unless I tell him I love him."--Blair. If I were Chuck I would help you. I'm just saying....
"Even broken up, you guys make me nauseous."--Blair to Dan and Serena. Thanks B for speaking for us.
"Smells a little like desperation."--Chuck to Blair about her perfume. hah.
"Unfortunately there was no hard evidence of that. Literally."--Blair to Dan about Chuck. Nice.
"Hey bitch. You are a bitch."--Kaitlin Cooper. Haha.
"Oh don't do it B. You don't want you're obit to say you died in Brooklyn."--S. I LOVE YOU.
"I am, I am totally your bitch."--Little J to Agnes.
"What have we here? Jenny Humphrey caught in her knickers by Nate, her knight in shining Armani."--GG
So no Lily tonight and very little Rufus. There are some things I'm not excited about, but all in all, I have to say, that no matter what, I LOVE THIS SHOW. Until next time.
If there was a theme running through tonight's episode, it was boundaries and the need of teenagers to push them as far as possible. Let's start with with our number one boundary pusher, Little Jenny Humphrey. It was only a matter of time before Little J got back to testing the waters. She wasn't a 15 year old beard last season for nothing. Her first boundary of the night? Human vision. What the fuck is up with her hair? It looks like a cat died on top of her head and then got sprayed with olive oil. Here's a tip Little J: MULLETS LOOK AWFUL NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE. Poor Taylor Momsen (that's the actress who plays Little J), she paying a real price for fame. Apparently her assault on the audience's eyes was not enough for Little J, since she decided to go head to head with Eleanor Waldorf. Eleanor is using "meeting with buyers" as a carrot to keep J working as her personal sweatshop. Apparently Little J is the only person that can produce anything the designers want. This fact is brought to Little J's attention by a model named Agnes (played by KAITLIN COOPER from the O.C.) KAITLIN COOPER also has a sketchy boyfriend named Max who likes taking pictures (read: amateur pornographer) and a lot of model friends and contacts. Little J is impressed with Agnes and, after Eleanor reams her for not having a dress prepared for the meeting, quits. This also provides the opportunity for the return of what I like to call the Jenny Humphrey Scary Face. You've seen it before: it's the face she makes whenever she feels like she's in charge of the situation. Still can't place it? It's the face where her eyes go all dead and you expect her to start spouting lines from The Ring. Remember now? Good. Little J is at first a bit worried about what this means for her future, but then Agnes shows up at the gallery opening (more on that later) and promises to introduce to her to an editor from Nylon who wants to do a feature on her. All Little J has to do is go with Agnes and sketchy boyfriend to a "party." You know the kind I'm talking about: beer, music, couple looking to bring a third person into their bedroom. That kind of party. Before you know it, Little J is dancing around in her bra (which I would be ok with except for the fact that the actress that plays her is actually 15 so NOT COOL) until Nate, who disapproved of her going to the sex party, comes to get her and refuses to leave without her. Little J is indignant, until Nate gives her his sexy eyes and they make out. Confused as to why Jenny and Nate are now an item? So am I. Boo show. There was not set up to that one at all. You can do better.
Moving on to our "B stands for Better" plot, Blair is now chasing after Chuck, pushing her ability to give in to her feelings and actually do something she would never actually do: be the pursuer. Ughh. Nope, our B would much rather lie in bed and take matters into her own hands, if you know what I mean (wink, wink, nudge, nudge). B is at so much of a loss about what to do that she actually lets S talk her into taking advice from Dan Humphrey. Yeah, that's a good idea B. Hey, here's another: why don't you tell Chuck you're a tranny. I bet that will work out just as well. Dan actually gives Blair some decent advice: Chuck is a guy, so all B has to do is throw herself at him repeatedly and eventually he will give in. Duh. This leads B to: lace stockings, touching Chuck's crotch, candles in Serena's bedroom, and lingerie. It also leads B and S to make several trips to Brooklyn so that B can get more advice from Douchey Dan (I hate Dan). While B consults with the jackass, S meets the weird looking artist who is putting the show together, and I think you all have to agree with me that this is certainly a step down for our wonderful goddess. Dude--who's name is Aaron apparently--looks like that creepy guy from section who would just stares at you and makes you feel uncomfortable. There's a rebound guy, S, and then there's insanity. Don't be insane, S. You can do better. So while S is flirting with weirdo, Vanessa, who was in the episode for all of two seconds, thank god, tells him about the Cruel Intentions Chuck and B had last week, the bitch. Dan decides to manipulate B into refusing to confess her feelings as she was finally getting ready to do, to which I say: oh ho Daniel, finally starting to come over to the dark side are we? Jackass. Can't be so judgmental anymore can we? Jackass. I hate you. So B caves and she and Chuck start arguing about their inability to act like anyone but the people from Cruel Intentions to each other and B leaves in tears. S sees her and I'm like "Oh yes, S, is going to flip her shit." She confronts Dan and he admits he manipulated B. Yup, here she comes. Dan says the only reason he helped Blair was that he was afraid S was going to flip her shit on him. Which she should Dan, because she is so much better than you. S loves being told people are scared of her, so she relents. Dan also tries to put things right by telling Chuck to go to Blair, but all that happens is that they both admit they're not ready to be together, as evidenced by their inability to say "those three little words." I have three little words I can say: WHAT, THE, FUCK?!!! Seriously, show, you better get these two together soon. You're giving the audience blue balls and they're going to get pissed.
Quote time:
"Don't forget, God always watching Miss Blair."--Dorota when she catches Blair practicing her master debating techniques.
"I have an itch that only Chuck can scratch and he won't oblige unless I tell him I love him."--Blair. If I were Chuck I would help you. I'm just saying....
"Even broken up, you guys make me nauseous."--Blair to Dan and Serena. Thanks B for speaking for us.
"Smells a little like desperation."--Chuck to Blair about her perfume. hah.
"Unfortunately there was no hard evidence of that. Literally."--Blair to Dan about Chuck. Nice.
"Hey bitch. You are a bitch."--Kaitlin Cooper. Haha.
"Oh don't do it B. You don't want you're obit to say you died in Brooklyn."--S. I LOVE YOU.
"I am, I am totally your bitch."--Little J to Agnes.
"What have we here? Jenny Humphrey caught in her knickers by Nate, her knight in shining Armani."--GG
So no Lily tonight and very little Rufus. There are some things I'm not excited about, but all in all, I have to say, that no matter what, I LOVE THIS SHOW. Until next time.
Clip of the Day: Solid as Barack
Because there is a part of me that hopes that this is what his infomercial will actually be Wednesday night:
Friday, October 24, 2008
Clip of the Day: Is Oprah Next?
Because it really seems like SNL is pulling out all the stops with these guests stars (and Oprah won't be on SNL but she will be on 30 Rock, which you should all watch):
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Another One Bites the Dust
And by another one, I mean another male in Seattle Grace has been caught in the web of crazy that is Izzie Stevens. You would think that after living with the Bat Shit One, Alex would realize you keep her firmly planted in the friend zone and you don't let her get out. Instead, Alex, like so many men before him, got distracted by the shiny hair and the unnatural desire to insert herself into people's lives, and kissed Izzie after one of her holier-than-thou "I'm here for you" speeches. I guess I wouldn't be so upset about this if it weren't for the fact that WE'VE ALREADY SEEN THE ALEX/IZZIE HOOKUP STORYLINE. And we all remember how that ended: Izzie met Denny and became BAT SHIT CRAZY. Who is she going to meet when Alex dumps her this time? A paranoid schizophrenic? A sociopath? Someone with incurable chlamydia? Whoever it is, it'll probably push her over the edge and she'll try to blow up the hospital, which may or may not be a bad thing, since several other characters were uber-annoying this week (Caveat: I watched this episode after a long work happy hour, so I'm going based on my notes and my recollections).
Let's start with McDreamy, who I will now refer to as McEgo, because seriously, dude's ego has blown up after the clinical trial gets profiled in some medical journal, which refers to it as the Shepherd method, as opposed to the Shepherd-Grey method. This sends Meredith into a tizzie since she thinks she deserves credit too, but McEgo is all "Listen bitch, you're a little resident, I'm an attending with amazing hair, I don't care if it was your idea, I'm taking the credit. Now let's go home and have sex, woman" Ok I made up the last part, but the first part pretty much describes how their conversation went. To be fair, dude has a point: Mer is just a resident, and she can't seem to manage getting through a kidney transplant surgery without DROPPING IT ON THE FLOOR! I thought my head was going to explode when I saw that, because seriously who the fuck would keep the table with the transplanted kidney that far away from the patients body? Unless you wanted something like that to happen. Seriously, what. the. fuck. This leaves Mer feeling pretty bad about her surgical skills (which after reading her mother's diary she already thinks are not up to Grey-snuff). So what does McEgo do? He's gives her one of the bad kidneys from the transplant surgery. I guess flowers are no longer a suitable gift. But seriously, that kidney in a jar looks like something out of a bad sci-fi movie. And, of course, Mer is all like "Ooh a present! My dead brilliant world-class surgeon mother never gave me presents, or love. I will love you again now until I have another commitment freakout." So McEgo is all "Good bitch, now let's go home and have sex," which they do, WITH THE KIDNEY ON THE NIGHTSTAND. Ewwwww.
Moving on to the night's third awful plotline, Lexipedia (I really like this nickname) is on the verge of standing outside George's bedroom with a radio over her head, and by that I mean decorating George's locker in the fancy residents lounge. Because this is high school and George is a fifteen year old girl. Since George is now a resident, the other residents have to each give up one of their interns to him. This leads to a lot of schoolyard stuff where the residents make the interns stand in front of them as they say mean things about them as they choose. Lexipedia of course would love to be one of George's interns since she would love to be, um, under his control. (And yes that was a sexual metaphor, in case you were wondering.) Then she gets all upset at the end of the episode when George didn't request her to be one of his interns (as if Cristina was actually going to give up her human encyclopedia) and inadvertently confesses her love after saying "You don't see" a bunch of times. Lexie, do you want to wind up like Izzie? STOP CHASING AFTER MEN WHO DON'T CHASE AFTER YOU. It's pathetic and sad. Have some self respect, girl, you have a photographic memory.
Ok now we can cover the night's bright spots: Bailey and Callie and Hahn (not all three of them together, though, that would be......well that would be weird because Bailey is like a mom and ewwwww). So Bailey is awesome and organized the six way transplant and then was even more awesome in convincing the woman who no longer wanted to participate after finding out her husband was cheating on her to continue with it because it was a good thing. Bailey is like a sassy litte guru with all of her wisdom. I wish I could put her in my pocket and pull her out at those times of the day when I would benefit from her sage advice.
So Callie and Hahn. While I think they're both awesome, I personally don't find either of them particulary attractive. That being said: LESBIANS. Good. Awkward sex? bad. Callie getting sex advice from Sloan? good. Callie asking for a redo in the lounge at the end? Very good. I can't wait for the rest of the hospital to find out about them.
Other things I liked:
- MARCUS DIXON as one one of the kidney patients. (Alias fans, you know what I'm talking about).
- Sloan's reaction to hearing about the awkward Callie/Hahn sex. Priceless.
- The reappearance of Dr. Major Hunt. Looks like Cristina will be getting a more interesting storyline soon.
- Joe the Bartender. Nice to see he's still around.
Other things I did not like:
- Meredith's braided hair. I'm sorry, Pollyanna, I can't help you husk your corn.
- Alex and Izzie using the patients as pawns in their awful relationship game. STOP IT.
- The blatant lying in the promos saying shit was going to hit the fan this week, when the worst thing that happened was the dropped kidney. ABC, you need to stop lying.
- The Chief becoming way too obsessed with publicity for the hospital that he's losing sight of what's important: patient care. Dude should have had a little more heart when Bailey said DIXON's transplant wasn't taking.
Quote time:
"Interns. The other white meat."--Alex
"Diseased kidneys are not chotchkes for your coffee table."--Bailey. Apparently they're only for night stands.
"You, you're lazy. You're whiny. Butterfinger over there is downright depressing and you Yang, you, you're just annoying."--Bailey to Karev, Izzie, Mer, and Christina
"Take off your pants."---Callie to Erica. Bow chicka bow wow.
BSCI Index: 7.3. The Bat Shit One's little speech at the end almost rivaled the awful, awful "I believe" speech from the episode where Mer almost died. I don't like where she's trending people.
All in all this was an engaging, but not particularly good episode in my book. But like I always say, indifference is worse than hatred, so while I might not agree with the plot, at least it provoked a reaction for a change.
Oh no
People.com ran a story this morning that Taylor Momsen, Jenny from GG, has been hospitalized with "a severe, potentially life-threatening throat infection" but that she is expected to make a full recovery and return to work on Friday. I'm sorry but what? She almost died but she's going to be fine? Is that even possible? Is this story even true? I'm confused, but perhaps that's because I was distracted by the picture of her awful new haircut, which you can see here. It is nice to hear that's she ok, though, as GG wouldn't be the same without her awkward faces and desire for fame and power. Feel better Little J.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
"Somebody's a Bitch"
It feels like I'm live blogging tonight. Anyway, I'm watching Dirty Sexy Money right now, and I have to say, I love Karen Darling. Her ditzy socialite act is amazing and endearing, and we all know she's only being half serious since she's acting as her father's spy by sleeping with the enemy. Obviously the girl's got brains, but then she goes and calls Lisa a bitch and accuses her of being hormonal. Brilliant. Just wanted to say that.
A Quick Thought on The Mentalist
I love The Mentalist: I think it's funny and interesting and easy TV watching. One thing though: In the three episodes I've seen, the culprit has appeared in the opening scene. I get that this is par for the course with a procedural, but it would be nice if they changed it up so that wasn't the case. It would be nice. I will say though that I enjoy the way they reveal the culprit because it's usually pretty great, mostly because Simon Baker does a good job of playing the know-it-all. I think this may be my favorite new show of the season (probably because it requires the least effort on my part--all of this TV watching is exhausting, but this one makes it feel easy).
I Knew It!
I knew it! I knew it! I knew it! Spoiler warning for those who haven't seen Monday's HIMYM: Stella is NOT the mother. Shocking? Not really. The title of the show is How I MET Your Mother, not how I MARRIED Your Mother. Mark my words, boys and girls, this show will end with Ted meeting his future wife, then Future Ted saying "And that kids, is How I Met Your Mother."
That being said, I think it was kind of shitty to have Stella run off with her ex. Believable, but still shitty. But Ted was certainly not ready to get married. Especially not in some hippy, dippy yogalates ceremony. The good thing is that this now sets us up for Ted and Robin to become roommates, which was teased in Ted's birthday episode from last year, and now will happen. Perhaps we'll also get to see the goat again as well.
Other things I liked:
That being said, I think it was kind of shitty to have Stella run off with her ex. Believable, but still shitty. But Ted was certainly not ready to get married. Especially not in some hippy, dippy yogalates ceremony. The good thing is that this now sets us up for Ted and Robin to become roommates, which was teased in Ted's birthday episode from last year, and now will happen. Perhaps we'll also get to see the goat again as well.
Other things I liked:
- Stella's sister. She was definitely above the curve on the Hot-Crazy Scale. There was no way Barney could resist this ex-vegan begging for, um, meat (snicker, snicker, snicker).
- The faces Barney, Lily, and Marshall made when they found out the yoga center had no alcohol and no meat.
- Robin working on the Japanese news-game show. Loved that monkey.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Clip of the Day: Say Hello to Your Mother For Me
Because aside from Sarah Palin this was the funniest thing about SNL the other night (and I've included the first clip from two weeks ago as a refresher):
Monday, October 20, 2008
Gossip Girl + Cruel Intentions = My Brain Exploding From all the Awesome
Oh wow. It's Monday again, and you know what that means: GOSSIP GIRL. This show has really hit it's stride. When I think back to season 2 of The O.C., the other Josh Schwartz show, by episode 7, which is where we are, that crap was already in decline, whereas with this wonder things are just starting to heat up again, and boy did they heat up tonight.
While there was a lot of good stuff in tonight's episode, I think the first thing we must address is what I will call the Cruel Intentions plot, because that's what it was. Blair was Sarah Michelle Gellar, Chuck was Ryan Phillipe, and Vanessa was Reese Witherspoon. B wanted Chuck to seduce and humiliate V but then freaked out when it seemed like Chuck might actually care for V. This leads B to verbally attack V herself, which Chuck doesn't like, but then after losing his chance with V (for the moment it seems) Chuck goes to B's boudoir, where she's sitting waiting for him with candles and sexy lingerie and OVERLOAD OVERLOAD OVERLOAD.......Anthony's brain rebooting in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.......ok, B and Chuck start to go at it, but then Chuck (in a nice nod to the season premiere) asks B to say the three little words he couldn't say himself, but she doesn't. Chuck, supposedly changed now from his interactions with V, tells B that she'll have to chase him from now on, since he's done chasing her. He leaves without any sex, to which I say: DUDE, sexy girl who is CLEARLY in love with you regardless of what she says wants to HAVE SEX WITH YOU (you who have been impotent to all other girls besides her btw) and YOU WALK AWAY BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T SAY I LOVE YOU?!! Who are you, Dan Humphrey? Jeez, seriously. I will say that I hope they don't drag out this tension between the two for too, too much longer, because although I really enjoy it, I'm afraid that the buildup is never going to live up to the reality. (I was going to make a joke about blue balls, but didn't--not because I think it's beneath me, but rather because it would probably sound creepy. Moving on.)
In the night's other main plot, Serena has decided to rebel against Lily and Bart's new family rules. You know what that means: Serena + rebelling = my brain exploding. Do not look directly at her, boys and girls, her glow will blind you. Like it did when the camera gave her the once over in that red dress before she broke curfew. Or like it did when she delivered the verbal smackdown on her mother in front of a room full of guests, which I must say was amazing. There are few shows that can me nake me cringe in horror at what I'm watching and yet keep me so enthralled that I cannot look away. I watched the episode with my friend Julia and by the end of S's rant we both had our hands over our mouths. While Serena was somewhat justified in being resentful (having to remember the difference between Klaus and Claus would make me crazy) she should be a bit more respectful of her mother, who if I remember correctly, only married her current husband because Serena asked her not to run away with the love of her life. That being said, I don't want anyone to think I'm actually criticizing Serena, because I would never want it to get back to her that I said something negative, because I love her. (Do you hear me, S?)
In the evening's C-plot. Annoying Dan and Poor Little Rich Boy Nate continue hanging out together since everyone else on this show is too interesting to be around them. Nate is squatting in his family's mansion (oh poor little rich boy) until Dan finds out, invites Nate over for dinner, then invites him to stay, to which Nate says no, and then yes (and this sounds a lot like the plot of a 7th Heaven episode, which means BLEEEEEEEEECH).
Other things I liked:
"Bart and me, we made the decision together. We are in complete agreement on this matter."--Lily. I'm so sure you did, Lil, I'm so sure.
"Archibald, isn't it about time you ended this bromance? What happens at Yale, stays at Yale."--Chuck to Nate about Dan. Hah.
"What are you doing here with those? Shouldn't you be at Whole Foods?"--B to V
"Oh I forgot to put on underwear."--S to Bart. (BRAIN EXPLODING!!!!!)
"Dan I know that you're Mr. Soccer now, but we both know that you prefer to hang out with girls."--J to Dan. Double hah.
"Careful B, one thing about making a deal with the devil, he always comes to collect."--GG
"Did you have a reason for coming here? If it was to insult me there's a website you can go to."--Chuck to Vanessa
"Rum runner. Womanizer. Millionaire. He was my kind of guy."--Chuck about Joe Kennedy
"Don't forget that weekend with Sarkozy. You made us go to Euro Disney."--Eric to Lily
"What took you so long?" "If you thought that was long, you have no idea what you're in for."--Chuck and Blair (BRAIN EXPLODING AGAIN! And a very good line. That one's gong into the bank).
My DVR cut out the scenes from next week, so I will just have to wait with baited breath until it's up on YouTube. T-minus one week until the next new episode. You should start preparing yourself now.
While there was a lot of good stuff in tonight's episode, I think the first thing we must address is what I will call the Cruel Intentions plot, because that's what it was. Blair was Sarah Michelle Gellar, Chuck was Ryan Phillipe, and Vanessa was Reese Witherspoon. B wanted Chuck to seduce and humiliate V but then freaked out when it seemed like Chuck might actually care for V. This leads B to verbally attack V herself, which Chuck doesn't like, but then after losing his chance with V (for the moment it seems) Chuck goes to B's boudoir, where she's sitting waiting for him with candles and sexy lingerie and OVERLOAD OVERLOAD OVERLOAD.......Anthony's brain rebooting in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.......ok, B and Chuck start to go at it, but then Chuck (in a nice nod to the season premiere) asks B to say the three little words he couldn't say himself, but she doesn't. Chuck, supposedly changed now from his interactions with V, tells B that she'll have to chase him from now on, since he's done chasing her. He leaves without any sex, to which I say: DUDE, sexy girl who is CLEARLY in love with you regardless of what she says wants to HAVE SEX WITH YOU (you who have been impotent to all other girls besides her btw) and YOU WALK AWAY BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T SAY I LOVE YOU?!! Who are you, Dan Humphrey? Jeez, seriously. I will say that I hope they don't drag out this tension between the two for too, too much longer, because although I really enjoy it, I'm afraid that the buildup is never going to live up to the reality. (I was going to make a joke about blue balls, but didn't--not because I think it's beneath me, but rather because it would probably sound creepy. Moving on.)
In the night's other main plot, Serena has decided to rebel against Lily and Bart's new family rules. You know what that means: Serena + rebelling = my brain exploding. Do not look directly at her, boys and girls, her glow will blind you. Like it did when the camera gave her the once over in that red dress before she broke curfew. Or like it did when she delivered the verbal smackdown on her mother in front of a room full of guests, which I must say was amazing. There are few shows that can me nake me cringe in horror at what I'm watching and yet keep me so enthralled that I cannot look away. I watched the episode with my friend Julia and by the end of S's rant we both had our hands over our mouths. While Serena was somewhat justified in being resentful (having to remember the difference between Klaus and Claus would make me crazy) she should be a bit more respectful of her mother, who if I remember correctly, only married her current husband because Serena asked her not to run away with the love of her life. That being said, I don't want anyone to think I'm actually criticizing Serena, because I would never want it to get back to her that I said something negative, because I love her. (Do you hear me, S?)
In the evening's C-plot. Annoying Dan and Poor Little Rich Boy Nate continue hanging out together since everyone else on this show is too interesting to be around them. Nate is squatting in his family's mansion (oh poor little rich boy) until Dan finds out, invites Nate over for dinner, then invites him to stay, to which Nate says no, and then yes (and this sounds a lot like the plot of a 7th Heaven episode, which means BLEEEEEEEEECH).
Other things I liked:
- Seeing Duchess COUGAR in the previouslies, for obvious reasons that have been well hashed out here.
- Dan playing soccer, if only because it's refreshing to watch him act completely lame about something new instead of (1) being a writer or (2) judging Serena
- Bart Bass, because I KNOW he's up to something and I want to know what it is.
- The look on Blair's face when she saw Chuck with Vanessa.
- Lily van der Woodsen.
- The minimal number of Rufus sightings.
- S apologizing to Dan for being mean to him. S, don't you remember he GOADED YOU INTO IT? And don't you remember that he's awful? New Serena apologizes to NO ONE.
"Bart and me, we made the decision together. We are in complete agreement on this matter."--Lily. I'm so sure you did, Lil, I'm so sure.
"Archibald, isn't it about time you ended this bromance? What happens at Yale, stays at Yale."--Chuck to Nate about Dan. Hah.
"What are you doing here with those? Shouldn't you be at Whole Foods?"--B to V
"Oh I forgot to put on underwear."--S to Bart. (BRAIN EXPLODING!!!!!)
"Dan I know that you're Mr. Soccer now, but we both know that you prefer to hang out with girls."--J to Dan. Double hah.
"Careful B, one thing about making a deal with the devil, he always comes to collect."--GG
"Did you have a reason for coming here? If it was to insult me there's a website you can go to."--Chuck to Vanessa
"Rum runner. Womanizer. Millionaire. He was my kind of guy."--Chuck about Joe Kennedy
"Don't forget that weekend with Sarkozy. You made us go to Euro Disney."--Eric to Lily
"What took you so long?" "If you thought that was long, you have no idea what you're in for."--Chuck and Blair (BRAIN EXPLODING AGAIN! And a very good line. That one's gong into the bank).
My DVR cut out the scenes from next week, so I will just have to wait with baited breath until it's up on YouTube. T-minus one week until the next new episode. You should start preparing yourself now.
Clip of the Day: The Real One
Because I wish she would have done some fancy pageant walking (and I loved the Mark Wahlberg cameo). I've also included the wonderful Palin Raps sketch:
Friday, October 17, 2008
Clip of the Day: Dementia Looks Scary
Because that what you must have if you're an adult and you have imaginary little friends, right?:
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Clip of the Day: My Name Is.......
Because they mentioned Credit Dauphine last night on Eli Stone. Can you find Credit Dauphine in this clip?:
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
True Story: Ivy League Schools Make People Go Bat-Shit Crazy
Is it the red-brick buildings? The grassy quads? The wood paneled libraries? The smell of money in the air? Whatever it is, something about Ivy League schools turns normal, studious teenagers into crazy, desperate, will-do-absolutely-positively-anything-to-get-in-yes-anything people. Or wait, may it's just the real Ivies (just kidding!). Tonight Gossip Girl went to Yale, and we were all the better for it, the much, much better for it. So what did our little boys and girls do to try to get into Yale? Let's review:
Other things I liked:
"If there's one thing I know, its that I give good interview. I could make Larry King cry."--B (I bet she really could).
"I heard Marc Jacobs named a purse after her."--Dorota about S
"Everyone knows that the only real Ivies are the Holy Trinity: Harvard, Yale, and Princeton."--B (Zing!)
"Have fun in Providence, and maybe you can get your hair dreadlocked while you're there."--B to S about Brown
"When it comes to war, the rule is never retreat, never surrender....but whoever said that, never met the new Serena."--GG (even GG calls her new Serena)
"What's your answer? Let me guess: Lauren Conrad."--B to S. (In reality, I think Lauren Conrad would want to meet S, not the other way around).
"Do you ever get tired of carrying that chip on your shoulder around? No wonder Serena dumped you."--Nate to Dan (Thank you, Nate, for saying what everyone else is always thinking).
"I hate that stupid headband."--S to B during the catfight.
"You may be the future leaders of America, but you're under the control of Chuck Bass. I own you."--Chuck Bass (That was awesome)
I love this show, and I'm really looking forward to next week, when it seems like the show will be reenacting the plot of Cruel Intentions, which will probably make time stop and the universe explode.
I. CAN'T. WAIT.
- S, who was originally supposed to spend the weekend at Brown but instead went to Yale to piss off Blair b/c she had received a personal invitation from the Dean who had been following her page 6 exploits, charmed everyone she came into contact with as they all bowed down to the altar of Serena (like all good boys and girls do).
- B, desperate to impress the Dean and outshine Serena (as if that could happen), became increasingly unhinged as she tried to score an invite to the Dean's private party, going so far as to bribe the Dean's secretary with porcelain cats and sabotage Serena during the Dean's parlor game by mentioning the guy she killed (although she didn't actually kill him as we remember from last spring--and kudos to Serena for not letting it get to her, girl is going to be wonderful at whatever she winds up doing in life).
- Dan, the poor boy from the expensive loft in Brooklyn, spent the weekend trying to get an additional recommendation letter because he had to make up for the one he was totally responsible for not getting, being judgemental, and getting tied up by the Skull and Bones, who thought he was Nate. Speaking of...
- Nate, the poor little rich boy, spent the weekend using his man bangs to attract pretty English students, pretending to be Dan Humphrey, befriending Dan Humphrey, and wearing my blue argyle sweater from Banana Republic.
- Chuck Bass spent the weekend being Chuck Bass, which involved trying to impress the Skull and Bones-ites, then totally fucking them over when they wanted him to betray Nate. He gave them Dan instead, which neither they, nor Nate, nor Dan appreciated.
Other things I liked:
- The My Fair Lady/Pygmalion opening sequence, because it provides further evidence that this is a very smart show. Other evidence: the literary references (Marquez and Georges Sand tonight)
- The way the show talked about the weird dynamics between the different Ivies, which is tough to understand if you don't know, but the show obviously does. Also, mentioning Senator's Schumer's daughter, who does indeed go to Harvard, was a nice realistic touch.
- THE CATFIGHT. I've waited until now to mention THE CATFIGHT because it wasn't quite as good as I had hoped, but it was still pretty FREAKING AWESOME. I love it when S and B throw down, and I like it when they make up, because then B can direct her manipulative crazy at someone else, which it seems like she's going to do next week (YES!)
- Serena talking about the Tudors, because this show makes good pop culture references, and I love good pop culture references.
- This quote from Michael Ausiello, from a story saying that we will be getting TWO EXTRA EPISODES OF GG this season, because I think it's pretty on point: "BTW, Gossip Girl is all new tonight. It's the episode where Serena and Blair beat the crap out of each other and I, in turn, thank God for inventing TV."
- The parting shot, which was of Columbia, not Yale (minor point I know, but I had to put something here, or else it would make me seem biased, because I'm not biased toward this show..........yeah right).
"If there's one thing I know, its that I give good interview. I could make Larry King cry."--B (I bet she really could).
"I heard Marc Jacobs named a purse after her."--Dorota about S
"Everyone knows that the only real Ivies are the Holy Trinity: Harvard, Yale, and Princeton."--B (Zing!)
"Have fun in Providence, and maybe you can get your hair dreadlocked while you're there."--B to S about Brown
"When it comes to war, the rule is never retreat, never surrender....but whoever said that, never met the new Serena."--GG (even GG calls her new Serena)
"What's your answer? Let me guess: Lauren Conrad."--B to S. (In reality, I think Lauren Conrad would want to meet S, not the other way around).
"Do you ever get tired of carrying that chip on your shoulder around? No wonder Serena dumped you."--Nate to Dan (Thank you, Nate, for saying what everyone else is always thinking).
"I hate that stupid headband."--S to B during the catfight.
"You may be the future leaders of America, but you're under the control of Chuck Bass. I own you."--Chuck Bass (That was awesome)
I love this show, and I'm really looking forward to next week, when it seems like the show will be reenacting the plot of Cruel Intentions, which will probably make time stop and the universe explode.
I. CAN'T. WAIT.
Friday, October 10, 2008
Clip of the Day, Part Deux: "Why the Steak Coupons?"
Because Meredith is just a little bit crazy (and for a change I'm not talking about Meredith from Grey's):
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Middle School is Never Over, Holly, Not in Scranton
So we're back to half hour episodes of The Office, which is fine, but I feel like not much happened tonight. Holly tried to the Scranton branch about ethics, which is the equivalent of herding cats in the middle of a tornado. Instead she uncovered that Meredith was a having a secret relationship with the office supply distributor in exchange for discounts and Outback gift certificates (hilarious). When she tried to get Meredith in trouble, she simply got her self ostracized, just like when she was a hall monitor in middle school. In the end, Michael eventually rose to her defense (after acting childishly mean to her for a while) so things went back to normal, or as normal as they ever get with those wacky Scranton folk.
Other things I liked:
"I think we can all totally agree that Holly is totally fantastic."--Michael
"It's a trick question--the bread is poisioned. And it's not your real family. You've been cuckolded by a stronger, smarter male."--Dwight to Andy. Hah.
"What I don't understand is.....why the steak coupons?"--Holly
"I just don't want employees thinking their jobs depend on performance. What kind of place is that?"--Michael
Other things I liked:
- Jim monitoring Dwight's personal time at work. (I did not like seeing Dwight pee into the bottle however.)
- Michael and Holly's coordinated dance.
- Dwight's sly look at the camera after he took some "personal time." Dwight, you dog, you.
- Michael tackling Jim after finding out about his and Pam's engagement.
- The complete lack of Pam. Don't let it happen again show.
"I think we can all totally agree that Holly is totally fantastic."--Michael
"It's a trick question--the bread is poisioned. And it's not your real family. You've been cuckolded by a stronger, smarter male."--Dwight to Andy. Hah.
"What I don't understand is.....why the steak coupons?"--Holly
"I just don't want employees thinking their jobs depend on performance. What kind of place is that?"--Michael
Rain, Rain, Go Away, But Please Let Dr. Wyatt Stay
Rain is nice. Rain is cleansing. Tonight's Grey's was full of rain (ok it was water from a burst pipe, but that doesn't work with my metaphor), and boy did we need it. We're two weeks removed from the nice, but awfully long and expository season premiere, and tonight's episode washed away that boringness and brought us some nice good Grey's. We had lots of interactions between the main characters, a nice balance between medical and personal, and good acting from our main stars. Let's break it down.
Stuff I liked:
"Eat the muffin. Taste the muffin. Remember the muffin."--Izzie. Was that a sexual metaphor?
"The hair, it's one of the things that makes me happy."--Mer about Der.
"What would you prefer Meredith: chocolate cake or an STD?"--Izzie. Well this time she's talking about sex without a metaphor.
All in all a good episode, and the previews for next week look good as well. I think Grey's may have returned to form, and that makes me very happy.
Stuff I liked:
- Dr. Wyatt. I don't think we can ever see enough of that lady. I want Meredith to stay in therapy forever.
- The Chief being a hardass. These people need to learn how to be professional in their workplace. I did not approve of him yelling at Bailey though, but in the end she was right and he was grovelling (a bit) so I guess it all worked out.
- Sandra Oh's face twitching and Ellen Pompeo's eyes bulging. They were blink and you miss them moments, but they were nice touches by two fine actresses.
- Callie and Hahn and Sloan, because I like the way they interact with each other.
- Alex calling Lexi a lexipedia because of her photographic memory, Hah.
- Alex treating Izzie like an ass but then revealing that he's secretly in love with her. I'm sorry, this is not the fifth grade.
- Derek trying to get Alex and Izzie to move out. Baby steps, dude, or do you want Mer to run out on you? (Kudos to Mer for standing up to him at the end).
- The drama surrounding George taking his test, but perhaps that's because I'm sick of George. Lexi can do better.
"Eat the muffin. Taste the muffin. Remember the muffin."--Izzie. Was that a sexual metaphor?
"The hair, it's one of the things that makes me happy."--Mer about Der.
"What would you prefer Meredith: chocolate cake or an STD?"--Izzie. Well this time she's talking about sex without a metaphor.
All in all a good episode, and the previews for next week look good as well. I think Grey's may have returned to form, and that makes me very happy.
Clip of the Day: I Love Her
Because while I don't usually post compilation videos, I'll make an exception for Veronica:
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Clip of the Day: Maverick-y
Because I watched this 5 times at work yesterday and it didn't get any less funny:
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Clip of the Day, Part Three: DANGER!
Because I know I should stop watching Friends clips and get ready for work, but I don't want to:
Clip of the Day, Part Deux: Gladys
Because I came across this after I saw the other one, and I forgot how funny it is:
Clip of the Day: Have I Ever Told You About the Time I Went Backpacking in Western Europe?
Because while I wasn't actually backpacking, I was travelling, and didn't have time to post, and I'm very, very sorry about that:
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Clip of the Day: "I Love Games"
Because I was in the mood for Alias clip, and Irina clips are always so good:
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
7 Reasons Why I Like The Mentalist
1) I like the idea of a character who is smarter than everybody else.
2) Simon Baker is a good actor and can totally carry this show.
3) The writers and actors balance the humor and drama well.
4) I like that Patrick Jane (the main character) is trying to make up for his past mistakes (I won't say what it is, but it's sad).
5) The supporting cast is good--Robin Tunney and Amanda Righetti especially.
6) It's a procedural I actually want to watch every week (so far).
7) It uses good character actors for the mystery of the week (although at this point if you cast Zeljko Ivanek in any procedural know that the audience will always know he is the villain).
2) Simon Baker is a good actor and can totally carry this show.
3) The writers and actors balance the humor and drama well.
4) I like that Patrick Jane (the main character) is trying to make up for his past mistakes (I won't say what it is, but it's sad).
5) The supporting cast is good--Robin Tunney and Amanda Righetti especially.
6) It's a procedural I actually want to watch every week (so far).
7) It uses good character actors for the mystery of the week (although at this point if you cast Zeljko Ivanek in any procedural know that the audience will always know he is the villain).
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