And by another one, I mean another male in Seattle Grace has been caught in the web of crazy that is Izzie Stevens. You would think that after living with the Bat Shit One, Alex would realize you keep her firmly planted in the friend zone and you don't let her get out. Instead, Alex, like so many men before him, got distracted by the shiny hair and the unnatural desire to insert herself into people's lives, and kissed Izzie after one of her holier-than-thou "I'm here for you" speeches. I guess I wouldn't be so upset about this if it weren't for the fact that WE'VE ALREADY SEEN THE ALEX/IZZIE HOOKUP STORYLINE. And we all remember how that ended: Izzie met Denny and became BAT SHIT CRAZY. Who is she going to meet when Alex dumps her this time? A paranoid schizophrenic? A sociopath? Someone with incurable chlamydia? Whoever it is, it'll probably push her over the edge and she'll try to blow up the hospital, which may or may not be a bad thing, since several other characters were uber-annoying this week (Caveat: I watched this episode after a long work happy hour, so I'm going based on my notes and my recollections).
Let's start with McDreamy, who I will now refer to as McEgo, because seriously, dude's ego has blown up after the clinical trial gets profiled in some medical journal, which refers to it as the Shepherd method, as opposed to the Shepherd-Grey method. This sends Meredith into a tizzie since she thinks she deserves credit too, but McEgo is all "Listen bitch, you're a little resident, I'm an attending with amazing hair, I don't care if it was your idea, I'm taking the credit. Now let's go home and have sex, woman" Ok I made up the last part, but the first part pretty much describes how their conversation went. To be fair, dude has a point: Mer is just a resident, and she can't seem to manage getting through a kidney transplant surgery without DROPPING IT ON THE FLOOR! I thought my head was going to explode when I saw that, because seriously who the fuck would keep the table with the transplanted kidney that far away from the patients body? Unless you wanted something like that to happen. Seriously, what. the. fuck. This leaves Mer feeling pretty bad about her surgical skills (which after reading her mother's diary she already thinks are not up to Grey-snuff). So what does McEgo do? He's gives her one of the bad kidneys from the transplant surgery. I guess flowers are no longer a suitable gift. But seriously, that kidney in a jar looks like something out of a bad sci-fi movie. And, of course, Mer is all like "Ooh a present! My dead brilliant world-class surgeon mother never gave me presents, or love. I will love you again now until I have another commitment freakout." So McEgo is all "Good bitch, now let's go home and have sex," which they do, WITH THE KIDNEY ON THE NIGHTSTAND. Ewwwww.
Moving on to the night's third awful plotline, Lexipedia (I really like this nickname) is on the verge of standing outside George's bedroom with a radio over her head, and by that I mean decorating George's locker in the fancy residents lounge. Because this is high school and George is a fifteen year old girl. Since George is now a resident, the other residents have to each give up one of their interns to him. This leads to a lot of schoolyard stuff where the residents make the interns stand in front of them as they say mean things about them as they choose. Lexipedia of course would love to be one of George's interns since she would love to be, um, under his control. (And yes that was a sexual metaphor, in case you were wondering.) Then she gets all upset at the end of the episode when George didn't request her to be one of his interns (as if Cristina was actually going to give up her human encyclopedia) and inadvertently confesses her love after saying "You don't see" a bunch of times. Lexie, do you want to wind up like Izzie? STOP CHASING AFTER MEN WHO DON'T CHASE AFTER YOU. It's pathetic and sad. Have some self respect, girl, you have a photographic memory.
Ok now we can cover the night's bright spots: Bailey and Callie and Hahn (not all three of them together, though, that would be......well that would be weird because Bailey is like a mom and ewwwww). So Bailey is awesome and organized the six way transplant and then was even more awesome in convincing the woman who no longer wanted to participate after finding out her husband was cheating on her to continue with it because it was a good thing. Bailey is like a sassy litte guru with all of her wisdom. I wish I could put her in my pocket and pull her out at those times of the day when I would benefit from her sage advice.
So Callie and Hahn. While I think they're both awesome, I personally don't find either of them particulary attractive. That being said: LESBIANS. Good. Awkward sex? bad. Callie getting sex advice from Sloan? good. Callie asking for a redo in the lounge at the end? Very good. I can't wait for the rest of the hospital to find out about them.
Other things I liked:
- MARCUS DIXON as one one of the kidney patients. (Alias fans, you know what I'm talking about).
- Sloan's reaction to hearing about the awkward Callie/Hahn sex. Priceless.
- The reappearance of Dr. Major Hunt. Looks like Cristina will be getting a more interesting storyline soon.
- Joe the Bartender. Nice to see he's still around.
Other things I did not like:
- Meredith's braided hair. I'm sorry, Pollyanna, I can't help you husk your corn.
- Alex and Izzie using the patients as pawns in their awful relationship game. STOP IT.
- The blatant lying in the promos saying shit was going to hit the fan this week, when the worst thing that happened was the dropped kidney. ABC, you need to stop lying.
- The Chief becoming way too obsessed with publicity for the hospital that he's losing sight of what's important: patient care. Dude should have had a little more heart when Bailey said DIXON's transplant wasn't taking.
Quote time:
"Interns. The other white meat."--Alex
"Diseased kidneys are not chotchkes for your coffee table."--Bailey. Apparently they're only for night stands.
"You, you're lazy. You're whiny. Butterfinger over there is downright depressing and you Yang, you, you're just annoying."--Bailey to Karev, Izzie, Mer, and Christina
"Take off your pants."---Callie to Erica. Bow chicka bow wow.
BSCI Index: 7.3. The Bat Shit One's little speech at the end almost rivaled the awful, awful "I believe" speech from the episode where Mer almost died. I don't like where she's trending people.
All in all this was an engaging, but not particularly good episode in my book. But like I always say, indifference is worse than hatred, so while I might not agree with the plot, at least it provoked a reaction for a change.
