Apparently These Emmys Were Planned By Meth Addicts

I look forward to the Emmys every year because they celebrate the thing I hold near ad dear to my heart: Television. I love seeing TV put up on a pedestal and applauded. What I do not like, however, is putting TV up on a pedestal, applauding it, then whacking it in the face with a rubber chicken, which was tonight's broadcast was like. Seriously, I'm thinking whoever planned this year's awards was on some serious drugs. How else do you explain the opening, where Howie Mandel literally COULD NOT SHUT UP? Or the fact they everyone kept saying "We're running behind, we're running behind," yet no one SHUT HOWIE MANDEL UP? Or that awful Laugh-In skit to announce nominees, then ANNOUNCING THE NOMINEES AGAIN? Perhaps it was necessary due to the Laugh-In skit being IN-FUCKING-COMPREHENSIBLE. Seriously? Seriously? This was you put together for TV's supposedly biggest night? Seriously? Shame on you ABC, shame on you.

Now on to the good stuff. The night marked Tina Fey's official coronation as Queen of Comedy (GO TINA!), what with her three Emmys for Writing, Acting, and Best Comedy, and Alec Baldwin winning for Lead Actor in a Comedy to boot. No one deserves the recognition more, and I hope this will encourage more people to go watch 30 Rock, because it's amazing. I was also pleased to see Damages pick up two acting awards Zeljko Ivanek for Best Supporting Actor and Glenn Close for Lead Actress, Drama. Personally, though, I would have been afraid to not give Glenn Close the award because I'd be scared of what she might do. Fortunately, that didn't happen.

Other things I liked:

• Oprah's opening monologue. Why didn't they let her host the show? She would have been better than that motley crew.
• Ricky Gervais taking his Emmy back from Steve Carrell and mocking Evan Almighty while doing it.
• Laura Linney winning for Lead Actress in a Miniseries. Lady deserves every kudos she gets.

Things I didn't like:

• Neil Patrick Harris NOT winning Best Supporting Actor Comedy. It was not legen-wait for it-dary, although Jeremy Piven winning for Entourage is a suitable alternative.
• Josh Groban singing those TV theme songs. Thank you for ruining them for me, Josh, really thanks.
• Chandra Wilson being passed over, AGAIN, in Supporting Actress Drama. Give lady her trophy already, please.
• Mad Men winning Best Drama. Now I'm sure it's a wonderful show and all, but I really wanted to see LOST win, because it was so amazing last season, and if not LOST then Damages, which was also amazing. I'm just a bit disappointed.
• Any and every one of the jokes the hosts attempted to make.
• And to reiterate, HOWIE MANDEL. I will not be watching Deal or No Deal anytime soon as retaliation for what he put me through his evening.
  

So ladies and gentlemen, are you happy with the way the awards played out? Or did one of your favorites lose and are you still angry about it? Discuss.