Question: Does Anyone Out There Actually WANT To Go To Yale? Didn't Think So

For those of you out there whom I'm about to offend, I apologize. Let me preface my remarks with this: I went to Harvard. I always wanted to go to Harvard and never ever wanted to go anywhere else. In case you didn't know, Harvard is, has been, and will always be the best school in the universe for ever and ever. Therefore I find it hard to believe, nay, I refuse to believe that no one from Constance/St. Judes wants to go to Harvard and that they all want to go to Yale. I could enumerate the vast number of ways Harvard is superior to Yale (it's located in a safer city, it has a better sports teams--to the extent that sports matter at an Ivy League school, it's campus is prettier, it's older, it has more money, etc., etc., etc.), but I won't, because then I'll be accused of being a Harvard snob (which btw, I probably am). These kids go to prep school, they have to know to this. Especially Blair, who is always overly concerned with being on top and being the best at everything. Why would she go to a school where her already large inferiority complex will just be aggravated over and over and over again and again and again?

This is not the only grossly unrealistic thing that bothered me. Blair only applied to one school? As if. No high school guidance counselor with half a brain (and I'm sure the one at Constance is top notch) would ever let someone apply to only one school without at the very least notifying said individuals parents. Also, the dean wanted to issue a press release? Serena is a socialite not a celebrity. No one is gonna care if some pretty rich girl with the most perfect boobs in the world gets in the best safety school on the planet, not unless she's being constantly hounded by paparazzi, which she's not. Also, the woman who called to ask for the press release? The dean's assistant is not an old woman from the 19th century who talks like Henry Higgins. Please. Also, Blair's acceptance gets "put on hold" until she completes "detention" because of "a prank on a teacher?" First, colleges only fuck with your acceptance if you do something really bad (there was this girl who supposed to be in my class at Harvard but got her acceptance rescinded for plagarizing all these articles she wrote for her high school newspaper and then lying about them). Second, why would Headmistress Kweller call Yale to tell them about said prank? Wouldn't that hurt the school's standing in Yale's eyes? Third, that new teacher was really dumb to run and tell the Headmistress at all, given Blair's declaration of war at the end of the episode. She should have tried to handle it herself. Now she's going to have her secret relationship with Dan Humphrey revealed in the next 4 episodes. (Come on, you know that's where this is headed what with S and D on the outs because of Lilfus.)

More unrealistic things, the reconciliation between Lily and Chuck. Chuck wants to take down Uncle Jack and goes to Lily for help and they bond over all of Chuck's failed plans (underage transexual hookers with anthrax cocaine). Eventually Lily realizes that the way to get rid of Uncle J is to adopt Chuck, since Bart's will only specifies that Chuck's legal guardian run the company, not necessarily Uncle J. Lily is able to have the papers faxed over to the opera, and signed during intermission, which leaves just enough time for Uncle J to try to sexually assault Lily on a coke high. Chuck of course saves the day, and then goes to Lily the next day and tells he would like to move back in. In return, Lily says she will give him the company on his 18th birthday. Next week: Lily tucks Chuck into bed and reads him a bedtime story. Ok, maybe not.

As for the rest of the stuff: Lilfus trying to make their relationship work as they straddle two worlds (been there, done that, let's see the secret child return please, although watching Rufus learn about opera was hilarious), Nate and Vanessa not having problems in their boring ass relationship besides some old lady hocking spit next to them at the opera (I hate them both), and SERENA'S BOOBS, did you see them at the opera? They are just so wonderfully distracting. Also, Nelly Yuki is turning into a real bitch and I like it (she told everyone Blair got wait listed). Also, it was nice to see the gay dads again, but the Yale theme breakfast made my stomach turn, for already disclosed reasons. Ok, that's all I've got for you this week.