Someone's Always Going to Get Hurt

How I Met Your Mother is the source of all knowledge for twentysomethings. If you ever are in a situation and you are unsure of what to do, go to HIMYM. "Should I take that new job?" "Should I invest in real estate?" "Am I ready to get married?" "Is it ok to do number 2 in the office?" HIMYM can and does answer these important questions on weekly basis.

Tonight's important question: "Can two exes ever just keep it casual?" We know that the answer is no, because feelings will always invariably get in the way, although HIMYM puts a nice twist on it. To avoid fights in their apartment, Robin and Ted decide to just start having sex. A bit of a non sequitur? Yes, but I'm not complaining. Marshall catches them, which means everyone eventually finds out, including Barney, who begins to buy TVs to smash up in alleys rather than admit that he loves Robin. Why did Marshall catch them? Because he came over to the apartment to drop a deuce, go poopie, take a crap, or as he euphemistically calls it, "read a magazine." Now I have to say I loved this read a magazine plot because for a long time I was afraid to use the bathroom for a prolonged period of time at work, until I realized that it was the best excuse for taking a 15 minute break without having anyone ask questions. Also, I loved the magazine covers yelling at Marshall, even Speidi whom I hate, because they were actually a little bit funny, although I think the Kim Kardashian one quoting Shakespeare was priceless. I can only wonder how many takes it took for her to get those lines right. Anyway, back to Ted and Robin and Barney. Instead of admitting his feelings, like Lily suggested, Barney decides to clean Ted's apartment to prevent any further arguments between Ted and Robin and thus any further sex. Ted, understanding that no man would ever clean another man's apartment, realizes that Barney must have feelings for Robin, and even though Barney won't admit them, Ted ends the arrangement. Barney on the other hand, after learning that Marshall finally worked up the courage to "read a magazine" on his own floor of the office, decides to go tell Ted the truth, but instead comes across Robin, who obliviously tells Barney how great it is that he can separate the physical from the emotional, unlike Ted and then asks him to go for tacos. My heart broke for Barney in this scene, because the moment you realize the girl of your affection does not look at you that way, nor will she be likely to in the future, is a painful moment indeed. I mean he could tell her how he feels, but she'd probably just give him that "I think we should just be friends line," which hurts even more, although it is better in the long run. Moving on, I wonder how long it is before Robin finds out how Barney feels. Because now that Ted knows, and Lily knows, it's only a matter of time before Marshall knows, and that dude cannot keep his mouth shut. All in all, this was a great post holiday episode and I'm thrilled to have the show back. And I'm also very happy that Jason Segel got his hair cut, because he no longer looks like some kind of child molester. As always, I leave you with quotes:


"Men and women need sex to live together. It solves all disputes."--Robin. Note to self: find female roommate.

"Ok this is strictly a physical relationship, there are no feelings involved, ok?" "Oh please, that's like telling The Fonz to be cool."--Ted and Robin. Robin is the perfect girl.

"Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha, you guys are still talking about this."--Barney, about Ted and Robin. Can you tell Barney doesn't actually think it's funny?

"Hey Robin, do you want me to see if that waitress has any sugar cubes for that high horse of yours."--Marshall, before high fiving Lily

"Story of my life: my cuteness interferes with people hearing my message."--Lily. Mine too, Lily, mine too.

"Celebrities pick up their dry cleaning? I pick up my dry cleaning."--Marshall while reading his celebrity magazine while "reading a magazine."

"You're right super hot lady who my wife keeps telling me why you're famous and I keep forgetting."--Marshall to Kim Kardashian, who is famous for having a big ass and.......having a big ass.