Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Country Roads, Take Me Far Away From Patty Hewes Please

Oh, Lordy, boys and girls, the bitch is back and she's going to be OUT FOR BLOOD. This is what I've been waiting for since the premiere. Bad Patty is back. I was very much tiring of the gentler Patty. It doesn't suit Glenn Close, and it doesn't suit the show. Patty is best when she's given fre reign to be a manipulator. Additionally, I hope to see more courtroom scenes between her and Claire Maddox, because I think their head to head is going to be AMAZING. Ok, so time to answer the questions for this week:
  • Why did Purcell kill his wife? So this was the big reveal: he did do it. I don't think any of us are shocked there. Perhaps she goaded him into it? Perhaps she was in the pay of UNR? Perhaps she was having an affair with Sutry (Purcell's boss). Quite frankly, I don't care why he did it. I'm just glad that plot is over.
  • Why did Purcell burn Patty? Oooh, now this is a good one. Why did he do it? Because he wanted to make sure they didn't come after his daughter too. That's what that first tete-a-tete between he and Patty was supposed to accomplish. But seriously, doesn't he know he's better off siding with Patty? Doesn't he know she will DESTROY him now that he's double crossed her? Especially after she showed some completely uncharacteristic kindness to him by letting him meet Michael. Dude, she is going to cut off your balls and eat them with some fava beans and side of nice chianti and she is GOING TO ENJOY IT. That look on her face at the end said it all. I'm scared y'all.
  • Why is this UNR plot starting to feel like a Grisham novel? Or a little like a more sinister version of Erin Brockovich. Small town in a rural state (love West Virginia by the way), some kind of pollution/contamination/corruption, big lawsuit in the offing. It feels a little Runaway Jury + a little Pelican Brief to me. I'd like it to stay a bit fresher personally.
  • Why in the hell would they cast Darrell Hammond as Sutry's go-to guy? Don't get me wrong, I think he's great---on SNL when he does his impressions. Here he was just a big old distraction. I was waiting for him to break into his McCain impression everytime I saw him. Poor casting choice.
  • Who is Ellen getting money from? So we saw a bit more of the frame story tonight: Ellen gets a briefcase full of money from whoever she shoots. So the questions here are pretty basic: Who is it? Why are they giving her money? What does Ellen need money for? You know, just basically what the fuck is supposed to be going on. Again, not to return to my criticism from last week, but this weak frame story is hurting the sho and it's showing in the episodes: at first I thought the season was going to be about getting Purcell off murder charges, but now that's done. We've lost the FBI fake case for Patty, and now she may not even be going up against UNR. Last season it was Frobisher, Frobisher, Frobisher. Let's get some direction and go with it, please.
  • Are we done with revisiting the 10 year ago period? Now that Michael has met Purcell, I would hope so, but something tells me no. And quite frankly I don't really want to see more scenes of Patty threatening Purcell in the past, because now she can do it in the present. Also, if we're going to the past, let's see the trial where Michael was conceived, or the first case where Patty crossed the line to the darkside, something else besides this. If anything, I think we should go with the second, because I'd love to know how Patty became Patty, because to quote another of my favorite shows "Bitches aren't born their made." (10 points to anyone who guess both the character and the show.)
So I think things are finally getting started, but I'm disappointed that it took so many episodes to make it happen. I leave you with two of my favorite Patty quotes from tonight:


"And Ellen, the next time I give you an assignment, just nod your head and get it done."--Patty. To my good friend who will remain nameless in order to remain innocent, who does this remind you of?

"You don't want to pursue this in court." "Why not?" "Because I'll destroy you."--Patty and Purcell. She will, Purcell, SHE FUCKING WILL AND IT WILL BE EPIC. EPIC!